Be Safe I Love You: A Novel by Hoffman Cara

Author:Hoffman, Cara [Hoffman, Cara]
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Published: 2014-04-01T00:00:00+00:00

Twenty-one

THE HOUSE PHONE was ringing when she walked in the door with her packages and she was too distracted to remember not to pick it up.

“I’m so glad to hear your voice!” her mother said, and the only word Lauren could think to respond with was, “Really?”

“Really.” Meg Clay laughed. “Oh, Sweetie. And I would really love it if you and Danny could come here for a few days. I’m on semester break and we could do some fun things.”

“Yeah? What kind of fun things are there to do in Buffalo?”

“Oh, I don’t know. We could go to the philharmonic or we could go to the Allen Street Dress Shop.”

“I’m sure Dan would love that.”

“Honey, I thought maybe you would like that.”

“You put a lot of thought into what I might like.”

Her mother was quiet and it seemed they were both waiting for Lauren to say the next part of the sentence. So she did: “You must have thought I’d like raising the son you left behind.”

She listened to her mother exhale but could already tell she wasn’t really upset at all. “Lauren,” she said clearly, with no shame, no hint of unhappiness, “I am very sorry that you were hurt when I moved away.” It was as if Meg was a prisoner who had to periodically restate her crime in public. Lauren hated that she was the one who made her do it, but she couldn’t stop.

“In the middle of the night,” Lauren finished the sentence. “And stayed away without calling for a year and never checked on us. How long does it take to go to fucking college? Don’t professors make money they can send to their children? And now you think that I am going to talk to you on the phone and go to your house and let you be an influence on my brother.”

There was a pause and Lauren could picture her mother nodding, again. Could picture the curve of her face and her lipstick, her thin frame, even the word “Meg,” the cute curt name seemed filled with indifference. Lauren knew it did take time to go to college and that Meg had only been an adjunct professor for years, that she had student loans to pay and worked part time at a diner, but still she couldn’t stop herself from saying those things. She hated that Meg was impervious to her words.

“I love you,” Meg said firmly. “I have always loved you and Danny. But sometimes leaving makes the most sense, does the least damage. Sometimes it’s the better option.”

Lauren said nothing.

When Meg asked, “Are you still singing?” Lauren hung up the phone.

• • •

Danny woke up at noon and she was standing in his doorway with sweats and sneakers. She’d packed the cold-weather camping supplies, a case of water and water-purifying tablets, thermal underwear, and the best insulated boots she could find for both of them in the trunk of the car. She tossed the running gear on his bed. “Merry Christmas

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